THE TREAT
by LittleMaggie
Summary: Simply it's a poem with a plot, but it's a parody and silly. I'm 14 and I wrote better then this but I felt like writing goofy 2day. R&R, no flames. A new poem added, equally stupid.
1. Default Chapter

A/N: I must be quite daffy, this isn't that funny, yet it's so weird I can't believe I wrote it. I guess, as I said, I should lay off the coffee and drink more water instead. (hey that rhymes!)!!!  
  
PS DON"T OWN ANY OF THE CHARACTERS.  
  
THE TREAT  
  
By: LittleMaggie  
  
  
  
Dumbledore had for himself a treat  
  
A chocolate muffin with marshmallow bits,  
  
Swirled in fudge and heavenly sweet,  
  
Resting on his desk.  
  
Then an hour later after the cake rested  
  
It had disappeared, and at the crime scene  
  
Two boys were taken in to the office (arrested):  
  
Neville and Harry, and faced their headmaster, quite mean.  
  
" Did you boys know anything of a candy  
  
I had readied to eat at my desk today?"  
  
Harry looked thoughtful, while Neville  
  
Of nervousness, on his feet did sway.  
  
" No sir, we know nothing." Neville said,  
  
"We were just simply in the hall at the wrong time,  
  
Please let us live, for if we don't, I'll be dead,  
  
And what will my grandmother say?"  
  
(Such news she will dread),  
  
Neville added into Harry's ear.  
  
" Is that a conspiracy you boys are plotting,  
  
Which I can quite easily hear?"  
  
Dumbledore had asked these words,  
  
His frown growing deeper,  
  
Harry knew he was scaling the hill of guilt  
  
And the road was getting steeper.  
  
" Where is the hard evidence,  
  
the proof, shall I say?" says Harry,  
  
" I say innocent until proven guilty, and since Neville's quite dense,  
  
It just means they can't kill us just yet."  
  
Neville let out a sigh of relief,  
  
His eyes glittering a comical way.  
  
" I wonder, myself, where the proof lies,  
  
before I face my doomsday?"  
  
" I see that the window's glass is out  
  
and the shards, quite pointy,  
  
lie scattered about,  
  
we should clean that up."  
  
Dumbledore said this with a bit of a thought  
  
Knowing the custodian must have missed  
  
That cob-webby, dusty little spot  
  
For it should have been clean of glass by now.  
  
" Also, you were both nearby  
  
As I gave out my angry bellow!"  
  
Dumbledore added, and Harry doubted  
  
If Dumbledore would remain a nice fellow,  
  
If indeed they were proven guilty  
  
Which they were not,  
  
Would they scrub floors the rest of their days;  
  
Would they be expelled on the spot?  
  
Dumbledore pondered, scratched his head  
  
He looked at Harry, then Neville,  
  
And then finally said:  
  
" My boys, the case is quite odd, I must say."  
  
" It seems you, Neville, are quite stout,  
  
While you, Harry, are the lean.  
  
Chocolate cakes Neville could do without  
  
While you, Harry, missed dinner."  
  
Suddenly something caught Harry's eye,  
  
No glass on the inside of the room,  
  
Yet there was a glimmer of glass outside.  
  
" With all due respect," Harry began,  
  
" I believe you're quite mistaken.  
  
How could I have broken in from outside  
  
And the sweets, supposedly, had taken  
  
If there is no glass inside?"  
  
" My boy, you're right!" Dumbledore exclaimed.  
  
" Neither of you, in fact, can be guilty then,  
  
Since that glass was broken from the inside out,  
  
Though I know not how or when."  
  
They turned their heads at the moment,  
  
For Professor McGonagall was standing just there,  
  
Her fingers wrapped round the heavenly chocolate,  
  
The other hand running through her gray hair.  
  
" Oh, I'm sorry, Albus, It seems I misplaced  
  
Thus little candy, sweet and fudge-laced,  
  
I hope you didn't miss it too much."  
  
She explains, and adds: " I haven't seen sweets as such."  
  
" That you haven't, Minerva! Am I glad you're here!"  
  
Dumbledore turned to the suspects,  
  
And as they shrank back in fear,  
  
Said: " You're free to go, my boys. . ."  
  
" . . . All that I now can wonder,  
  
Is why the glass is broken!  
  
Yet I couldn't be fonder  
  
Knowing my cupcake is here."  
  
Harry and Neville got out there mighty fast  
  
And then Albus told Minerva the tale, she let out a blast  
  
(Of laughter, of course), and she said:  
  
"Though. . . I wonder what happened to my loaf of bread?"  
  
Is this the end of this silly poem?  
  
I hope so because the computer radiation  
  
Isn't quite good for the author, my friend,  
  
So here I shall end. 


	2. The Bread

The Tale of The Bread  
  
Now, I'm sure, you all know  
  
That McGonagall had herself some bread  
  
All fresh and well-baked  
  
And it wasn't just something in her head  
  
It was as real as you or me  
  
And it had vanished too:  
  
It vanished swiftly, easily.  
  
This time, Malfoy was at blame.  
  
McGonagall, after having quite a laugh  
  
Over the vanishing candy of Dumbledore,  
  
Came across quite a gaff:  
  
Her loaf of bread was gone.  
  
Now why on Earth is all this food  
  
Simply disappearing at this school?  
  
Dumbledore thought this riddle was quite good,  
  
And wondered if Draco was the answer.  
  
After all, the Malfoy heir  
  
Had bread crumbs on his hands  
  
Under his fingernails, in his hair,  
  
And places unmentionable.  
  
Professor McGonagall took him in her office  
  
Along with his cheery crew  
  
Crabbe, quite messy-looking  
  
And the stupid Goyle, too.  
  
" Do you boys think you can explain  
  
The unmistakable way my bread  
  
Had been stolen off of me?"  
  
Draco wondered if this meant 'off with his head'.  
  
He knew he looked real guilty  
  
With the breadcrumbs on his body  
  
But it was really quite by accident  
  
And the cause: Ron Weasley and 'Harry Potty'.  
  
For these two friends played a nasty trick  
  
On the poor Slytherin boy  
  
They had poured breadcrumbs on him in his sleep  
  
And left him feeling boiling mad, and not as coy.  
  
Now he felt as if his time was running out.  
  
" I didn't do it, I swear!"  
  
He began to shout.  
  
" Why would I want your smelly old bread?"  
  
" Yeah, why would he?" Crabbe said,  
  
His brow ruffling and mad.  
  
" You better not say he's guilty,  
  
Because he'll go and tell his dad."  
  
Draco didn't like this, obviously.  
  
He said: " I'm not a baby, I won't run to daddy."  
  
He then grinned mischievously:  
  
" I do have some news for you, though."  
  
" Oh?" McGonagall wasn't surprised.  
  
She knew that Harry's every slip  
  
Would be reported by Draco Malfoy,  
  
Every single tiny bit.  
  
" Yes." Draco began his tail of woe:  
  
" Now listen here, for I won't repeat myself,  
  
Harry Potter is my obvious foe.  
  
Well, here goes."  
  
" I didn't take your bread,  
  
the bread crumbs on me aren't what you think.  
  
Harry and Ron had to go and spill these on me,  
  
While saying that I stink."  
  
" I was sleeping then, but my ears are pretty sharp  
  
I knew right off what had happened to me.  
  
I chased after them down the hall,  
  
Right up to Dumbledore's office, you see."  
  
" That's when Dumbledore had to go and bring him in,  
  
saying something about a missing treat.  
  
I swear that guy's a total loon,  
  
And all you people say is 'without him, Hogwarts isn't complete'."  
  
Draco sneered just then,  
  
His cold blue eyes showing he was saying the truth,  
  
Though an opinionated truth it may be.  
  
" I'll go kill Potter, if you'd like. Just tell me when."  
  
" That won't be necessary, dear."  
  
McGonagall said, trying not to laugh.  
  
" But that doesn't cut it, I fear,  
  
Since how do you explain my bread?"  
  
" Really, Professor, I didn't even know  
  
You had that nasty bread.  
  
What I do know, is this:  
  
Potter should have long been dead."  
  
This was said by Draco,  
  
His hate to Harry deepened now.  
  
Just as he thought up a devious plan to kill,  
  
Crabbe explained: " Holy cow!"  
  
They all turned to face Crabbe  
  
Who pointed at the door.  
  
There stoop Snape, holding the bread:  
  
" What's all this raucaus for?"  
  
" I can't teach my class, with this noise!  
  
I can't even keep my natural poise,  
  
As I speak about the dangers of this meal -  
  
It has sugars and fat in it!"  
  
Snape sneered at this, and said (being the usual mean old git):  
  
" I heard sugars make you cheerful,  
  
And Neville can speak for the fat bit."  
  
He looked at McGonagall with an angry glare.  
  
" Why, Severus, you took my bread!"  
  
McGonagall finally said,  
  
And as she said this Draco left the room  
  
His eyes filled with a murderous gleam.  
  
Crabbe and Goyle left soon after  
  
Realizing they were free to go.  
  
Of course, it took them longer to realize,  
  
Since they were abnormally slow.  
  
This left Severus and Minerva alone  
  
To squabble about the stolen bread.  
  
Maybe that explains a bit more  
  
From what the other poem said?  
  
A/N: Yeah this was even stupider then the other one. Sorry about that. 


End file.
